As a fifth grader I was walking from my bus stop to our home. I noticed smoke easing out from around the garage door of our neighbor across the street. The man that had always waved at me and spoke, had closed his garage door, turned on the car engine, and let his life slip away.
Last November a young friend chose a different method than our neighbor, but the outcome was the same. Between those 2 were many others that I knew, some vaguely, and some well. (at least I thought)
I was surprised each time I would hear of someone I knew making this decision. My surprise was brought about by my being very uniformed about such things.
I read recently that the Veterans Administration says 22 Veterans are taking their own lives every day. Others are saying the number is much higher.
I have recently come across articles speaking of alzheimer’s caregiver’s ending their lives.
Here is a quote I found on the internet this morning.
“The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames. And yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don’t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling”. –David Foster Wallace
I want to become more educated concerning suicide and see where that takes me.