Tag Archives: Across The Land

A message to me about caregiving 

Jack, you have been with your mom since January 24th, 2016. It is to keep her safe. You have been there 91% of that time. (who’s counting) She is almost 89 years old. She does not want to be alone at night. She needs company 5 or 6 times a day and you do not know when that will be. Buddy, you have been extremely loyal to her and the job. Jack, you are luckier than a lot of caregivers, you have family near. They have provided the safety net that other 9% of the time. Lots of caregivers have no help at all. But still you are there, hanging tough, bad attitude and all sometimes, but you are there. 

Jack, you are one of the most persistent men, I have ever known. It’s not going to get easier, but you WILL get stronger. Continue to get up every day, get dressed up and keep her safe. Your man foe, is in your head. Do what you have always done buddy. Keep Going. Don’t let the change get ya down. 

This post is to me, from me. That’s pretty cool huh?

Upon moving here with mom, at first their was no significance to the highway down the street. Long highways had become important to me. In 2013, I traveled across America, from the Atlantic to the Pacific Ocean. 2,594 miles were on foot. 458 in the passenger seat of a car. U.S. Highway 80 was once a cross country route. It now ends in the Dallas, Texas area. 

She starts at Tybee Island, Georgia and, in the past, terminated in San Diego, California. 

Here is a picture, near mom’s house in Georgia. Jogging west on Highway 80. 

At age 21, she bought a ticket to Laos, no affiliation – the rest is history 

you sure were something buddy 


how much should I give back? 

I’ve read or heard this formula, a few times. 

168 hours in a week.  56 hours sleeping, 56 hours working, 56 hours left. 10% of the left over time is 5.6 hours per week.  So, 5.6 hours a week dedicated to giving back. 

I found this quote a few minutes ago. I like quotes. Sometimes they help, maybe sometimes they don’t. Anyway, here it is. 

“If you wait until you can do everything for everybody, instead of something for somebody, you’ll end up not doing nothing for nobody.” ~ Malcom Bane

support groups on Facebook 

Over 46,000 folks are members of the 3 groups that I participate in. Each post is from an individual. Dementia is the common ground of the groups. Most posts are from caregivers in various stages of the part of their life, that includes dementia. 

My awareness is raised as I read, not only the posts, but also the comments, to the posts. 

Some comments are about family and friends that no longer call or visit. 

Many of the members no longer have a personal connection to dementia, but stay around to help others. 

On many occasions, I have read problems stated and solutions presented. There is a lot of knowledge spread out among these members. 

met him on his third ride across America . . . . . 

we came upon each other near Seligman, Arizona, in 2013. He was close to finishing his third bicycle ride across America. He’s 27 years old now. He cried as we departed. He seemed concerned at my endeavor. 

Tomorrow he loads up and is flying to a remote area in Africa to ride another 4000 miles or so. 

If I remember correctly, his is the first bicycle I saw, with a belt, not a chain. I met another long distance rider in 2016 with a belt driven bike. He was 66 years old and riding Route 66.

Today, a long distance bicyclist came through Roberta. He is heading to Pueblo, Colorado. 

he disappeared from Facebook a year ago . . . . .  

he emailed me this morning. Things are different now. I never suspected anything bad or sad. We met in 2013. “He called himself over the hill and fat.”

He sent a picture. He lost 93 lbs. 

  • No surgery
  • No medication 
  • No doctors

He said no to coming back on Facebook. Didn’t say why. 

He runs 3 miles daily, 5 days a week. On the 6th day, he runs 6 miles. The 7th day, he takes off and walks. 

We promised to stay in touch. 

Today was his birthday. He is 61 years old. 

During the time he was gone from Facebook I sent him an email one time monthly. I never missed a month. 

He apologized for the abruptness of his departure. We spoke on the phone this evening. 

Oh yeah, he is 5’10” tall and weighs in at 150 lbs.

I can do this job. I can adapt. I can be a caregiver #ENDALZ 

Some folks say they weren’t cut out for caregiving. I’m cut out to do what is my responsibility.  It may not look pretty at times, but I am here. This is my watch. 

remember the antelope  . . good times and bad

he said watching animals can teach. He saw antelope in a field. Things were great, they felt good. Life was good for them. 

A mountain lion appeared. 

The lion left. He had did his thing. The antelope immediately went back to enjoying life. They felt good. Life was good for them. 

maybe there is a reason they don’t call  #ENDALZ 

A call to me this morning: “My best friend stopped calling. It hurt. Being a caregiver has turned me into a complainer. Nobody wants to be near or talk with me. I finally called her yesterday. Her husband informed me, that she has cancer. It’s bad.”